There was a time after Brook and before Blake that I was very fit and active.  I started working out after I had Brook in order to get rid of the baby weight.  Since I am very bad at dieting, I figured by working out I would obviously burn calories and then hopefully want to put better food into my body because I had just worked so hard to burn my meal off.  Also, instead of just “working out”, I created a goal for myself, which was to run a half-marathon.  That way I could achieve something bigger than losing pounds on the scale.  That first half-marathon was amazing and so very hard, but I did it and the accomplished feeling was incredible.  After that, I was hooked…

Then in 2007 my friend Shannon and I made a group New Year’s resolution which was to compete in at least one major sporting event a month.  It could be biking, running or even a triathlon.  We blew that resolution out of the water.  Sometimes we would do two or three events each month just because we were athlete rockstars.  On the smaller events, I would take Brook in her stroller and she would love to watch all the runners and spectators.  Once she was able to walk, we even got her involved in some of the kiddie events that would take place after the main adult event.  Between participating in the events and training for them, I was in great shape and really developed a stronger relationship with Shannon based on being workout buddies.  Those were the days that running a half-marathon was really, “no big deal.”  I know that sounds crazy, but we were in such great athletic shape, that we could run 13.1 miles pretty much with little to no problem.  Then it became the game of beating our personal best times.

Bike Race 2007

But then I got pregnant with my second child and although I was still working out, I started to slow down and not compete as much.  My energy was all about creating the new life inside of me.  I basically worked out just enough to try to stay healthy and to minimize pregnancy weight gain.  Then, I lost her at 20 weeks (that is for another blog post), and went into a pretty severe depression.  I thought my body had failed me and that I was worthless.  I’ve never been so sad or so betrayed in my life.  And when I say betrayed, I mean by my body…this amazing body that could run 8 1/2 minute miles for 5 miles straight, couldn’t keep a baby healthy and alive inside of it.  My workouts were no longer important.  All that mattered was getting through the loss of my baby and trying to conceive another one as soon as possible.

Miracle upon miracles, Travis and I got preggers again right away.  I was so happy and so scared that all I did was concentrate on being pregnant.  I worked out a tini tiny bit, but I was nervous that if I over did it I might lose this baby too.  So, really my workouts stopped with Blake’s pregnancy.  Luckily, he wanted to live and we had our healthy and happy little boy on February 11, 2009.  Now that he is here and we are done with having anymore children, my body is screaming to get back into shape.

In my head I am still that same woman who could just get up, run 10 miles and then go about my day like it was no big deal.  The only problem is, my body isn’t as ready as my mind is.  I am working on it though, one step at a time.  I’m running like the turtle, but you know what?  Even the turtle eventually crosses the finish line.

PF Chang's 2006

Yesterday, I went out with Shannon and we conqured a 5.5 mile run!  It was the farthest I have ran since the end of 2007 and while it was not easy and although I am as slow as mollasses, I did it…one foot infront of the other.  I used to be quite a bit faster than Shannon, but now she can out run me by leaps and bounds.  I told her to soak up all the glory now, because when I come back, I’m going to be better than ever!  I missed hanging out with her during our workouts and I am estatic that we can slowly start having that part of our relationship back.  My new goal is to complete a full marathon next January of 2010.  I think I am off to a great start!  Now if only I can convince Shannon to run that far with me !